My life in retrospect

This is a post I hoped I wouldn’t make for a few more years but I can’t control time. Mickie girl would have been 13 today – her golden birthday – but she told us it was her time to go on October 17, 2023. I did everything I could to give her the best life and I still feel it wasn’t enough. Mickie was one of those dogs that only comes along once in your lifetime (if you’re lucky enough to have one at all) but boy am I lucky I had her.

See we grew up together. I got Mickie my senior of college. It was honestly not a very smart idea. I was 22, had no money, and lived in an apartment that didn’t allow dogs. But none of that mattered because we had each other.

Mickie was born Homecoming day (November 13) in 2010. I had pictures of her from then but unfortunately I lost them when that phone broke. I went to meet her 3 days later and instantly fell in love (actually I was dead set on getting a boy dog but she stole my heart instantly). She wouldn’t be ready to go home for several weeks which coincided with Christmas, so I waited to pick Mickie up until after I returned from IL. It was a cold night in January of 2011 that she came home for the first time. I remember I planned to be a firm owner and make her ride on the floor board and not the seat so I told my passenger to make sure she stayed put. (newsflash that didn’t last long – but must have made an impression because that was always where she felt safest when scared).

I realized after that night I didn’t care about her being on the seats. In fact she loved that little Ford Ranger of mine because it gave her a perfect built in seat with its own window to look out of. I wanted her to feel comfortable and safe wherever we went (and we went a lot of places together).

To “hide” Mickie in case the landlords came when we were away – I took her everywhere with me. She was a hit at the college parties. She learned cool party tricks and developed a fan club. We were inseparable those first few years together.

She definitely went through the cutest and funniest growth stages. She was disproportionate in many ways that first year or so. Her legs grew so fast at one point, she was nothing but legs it seemed. I loved watching her little ears stand up but once both ears finally stood up, they looked way too big for her body. So we nicknamed her “Radar”. She did eventually grow into everything.

She lived up to the Australian Cattle dog and Australian Shepherd mix because this dog had energy for days. I wanted her to be a fetch dog, so we practiced in the house and backyard. Thankfully her drive to play made teaching her recall pretty easy. She was definitely smart as a whip.

She loved trying new things and was such a super cool and fun dog. I’m sad we didn’t get the chance to try flyball earlier. She was truly a natural.

She would go anywhere with me. She was the best trail riding partner and cliff scaling dog. She didn’t care where we went, as long as she was with me.

If you weren’t paying attention, chances were you were going to get a bunch of kisses from the Mick. I always told her that nobody liked face kisses but that was a lie. What I would give for Mickie face kisses right now.

Mickie was a huge part of my school career. She did everything with me senior year. She came to celebration nights for graduation.

She helped grade student exams during my masters degree and sat pitifully as I had to finish writing my thesis (which was dedicated to my girl). And then she did it all over again while I studied and wrote my PhD dissertation. She even taught students herself in the intro behavior and training lab (she has earned her own honorary doctorate… Dr. Mick!). I’m so glad she was there when I finished these milestones but I’ll miss her at graduation.

Mickie was my best friend and knew how to comfort me when I was sad. She made everything better just by the wag of her tail or the incessant desire for me to throw her ball. Her favorite thing in life was the ball then me (in that order lol). My heart melts though when I look back at pictures and see the way she would look at me. I was her safe place, her home.

Around the age of 5 Mickie decided she preferred her own bed and while she’d snuggle, she always retreated to her own place in the closet (or bathroom if she was scared – lots of great bathroom stories lol).

But there was no better feeling than waking up and finding her snuggled up to me or laying on the ground next to me. She liked being sneaky about it so she would immediately jump up when she got “caught”.

She was the best alarm clock. She never wanted to miss breakfast so she’d wait until I opened an eye and then would jump up and smother me with love to wake me up. While it meant I didn’t sleep in very often, it was a great way to start my mornings, plus she was just the softest dog you’d ever pet.

Somehow Mickie miraculously found the fountain of youth and never really showed her age.

That dog has been through more life with me than most people I know. It may not have been the most responsible decision I ever made but it turned out to be the best one. I miss her so much and I know there will always be a piece of my heart missing. I made sure she knew how much I loved her right to the very end. I held her tight as we eased her pain and suffering and felt as her heart stopped beating. I cried into her body even though she was no longer there. I carried her tenderly to the car and cradled her as we drove to the crematorium. I gave her one last kiss before we left.

I regret nothing except we didn’t have longer together. I love her more than anything and I’ll carry her in my heart forever. Until we meet again baby girl. I love you.